As you can see from my posts, I’ve been a guest on several podcasts and radio shows in the last few months. I’m so grateful for this experience; it’s definitely forced me out of my comfort zone.
One question I get asked a lot is how to handle fear at work. Before I share my answer, I want to take you waaay back to 1983 (ish). I was twenty-two years old and worked as an entry-level admin in a tax department. I am still friends with many of those people; they were great. Well, most of them were great. You see, one of the “leaders” was one of my direct managers. He would rest his head on or near my shoulder as I was typing and he’d often make comments leading me to think he thought of himself as quite the catch (ugh, I don’t think so).
Anyway, when it was time for my annual review, I wanted to share that I wanted to do more than I was currently doing. So, after he shared his thoughts about my performance, I told him that I wanted to know what it would take to be a tax analyst. I didn’t have a degree and knew that the position required one, but I wanted to share that this was a goal. As soon as I shared my thoughts, he burst out laughing and said, “you’ll never be a tax analyst!” I really didn’t know what to say, but I know I was so hurt in that moment.
Are you afraid to tell your manager what you’d like to do next? If so, are you afraid that he/she will act as my (awful) manager did? If so, let me share with you that I left his office that day feeling hurt, but in a nano-second, I decided that I would do absolutely everything I could to prove him wrong. I turned that conversation into motivation to keep going to night school and finish my education no matter how long it took. If you’ve read my book, you know that it took a very long time.
I turned that conversation into motivation to keep going …
I decided that I would learn everything I could on the job and I’d pursue every opportunity I could to advance in the organization. A year or two later I was promoted into another department, but it would be many years before I would finish school.
Here’s the best part. I never did become a tax analyst, but I did advance in the organization so that I ultimately achieved a higher level than my old manager. Take that bad manager!
I could’ve let that conversation in 1983 ruin my confidence and accept that “I’d never be a tax analyst”. Maybe I could’ve let that conversation lead me to believe that I’d never do anything other than what I was already doing. You can do that too, but I really hope you don’t.
Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and cannot become. Sure, maybe you can’t get the job you want right now, but it doesn’t mean you can never get it. Don’t give up. Also, if you don’t achieve a goal, know that maybe it just wasn’t the right goal for you.
If you’re afraid of having a conversation with your boss, ask yourself “what’s the worst thing that can happen?” Prepare for the worst as a possibility and then have the conversation anyway. The more you flex this muscle, the stronger you will become. You’ll learn that it’ll take more to break you than someone telling you that you can’t do something you want to do.
Never ever hand off your personal power to someone else. You know what you are willing to do to achieve your goals and live your purpose. The tools in my book are there to help you as well. Go for your dreams!!
Be well!
